Moving Forward

Over the course of a year, I have had to come to terms with a few hard truths. I looked up, and myself and my phenomenal kids began entering a new stage.  Both sons,  now teenagers, have expressed missing their father to many, and we both so miss our family and friends in Erath County. I completed a PhD. and I now know that I have some very big research initiatives to pursue. The hard truth was evident; this isn't working. But then again, the last four years has been nothing but a series of events in which I have had to learn to let go. Leaving a small town was extremely hard on us, and the pain of letting go was and is still very raw and real.  A hole in our heart is still a very BIG issue. My kids have only known life on a very large historical nursery located in the center of  Texas. We have had a few obstacles in our path and we were fortunate to have some new experiences. I am grateful to the people I met along the way. They helped us through a very hard tim...

I have always prided myself as a positive and forward-thinking intellectual and at one point even branded myself as a "change agent". How does a "change-agent" manage failures and change in their own life?  This was my challenge in 2014. I looked up last fall to find myself facing divorce after a 17 year relationship, new challenges as a "single mom", huge career changes, relocation, new job, and finding time to complete goals associated with completing a PhD. I found myself questioning my beliefs, self-worth, choices, and ideologies. How does a FT working single mom manage everything? Should I continue pursing a degree? Why did my marriage fail? Was I wrong regarding my approaches to education? How do you pick up when the people you counted on are no longer in your life? Can you trust others? Is everyone out for themselves? How does it feel to be alone? Will my kids understand that I love them so much and it was all for them? I was separated for ...